Thursday, December 07, 2006


My new pet-peeve (as per Bust magazine) is straight women who call other straighrt women "breeders." This is a group of young(ish) largely women who don't want to have children and feel they need to make a huge fuss about it.

As a mother who is/was largely involved in the gay-boy community, it was painful enough hearing the term drip from the mouths of the guys. As a concequence, I felt like I had to DEFEND my decision to have a kid, like I was betraying the gay cause or something. Now, ironically, things have turned around. Most of my gay friends are involved with little children in some way, and even Dan Savge has become a dad.

Some lovely comments copied from the Mindful Things blog at

I would say that only a small subgroup of bitchy queens use the term breeder. And with so many gays and lesbians having kids--one way or another--it would be like the pot calling the kettle black nowadays.

7/24/2006 11:29 PM

Marko said...
If it wasnt for "breeders" our gay asses wouldnt be here! I dont use the term, I think its a pretty lame term. There a certain portion of gay people eho use that term and I dont agree with it. Not all of us use it, its really ignorant in my book!
I havent seen you at the planet forever!

Ironically, now I've been hearing the term breeder from straight women. This is even more offensive.

1. Do they KNOW it's a gay term?
2. A hetrosexual woman, whether she has kids or not, is a breeder. She has sex with men, therefore she has the potenial to have kids. This might be a wacky logic - but I think it's where the word comes from.
3. The use of this word is not "taking back a derogatory term." THAT would mean turning it into a positive term, which they are not.

Final Note: Women who don't want kids - I could care less, I'm fine with that! But, I don't put you down, don't put me down because I'm a mother and don't put kids down. After all, you had one and you were one.

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