Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Wanting Babies Like Themselves, Some Parents Choose Genetic Defects

In today's Science Times there is an article about parents "trying" through science to have "handicapped" babies in order to have children that are like them. My first response is Thank God! Someone who not only accepts people with disabilities, but actively WANTS them. But, I am of two minds about this.

I wanted my son to be gay. I'm not gay...but most of my favorite people are. I feel I "fit into" gay society more than straight. I also loved the idea of having a cute young son-in-law to hit the dance clubs with,. No avail, my son makes Bruce Willis look queenie. I guess I also harbored fantasies about Jeff having CP. How cute would that be? This in fact has been more difficult than the fact that Jeff is straight. He is TOO physically fit, and I can't keep up.

The two cases in the Times article spoke about deaf parents and parents with dwarfism. They, like me, want children like them and are willing to use science to do it. I'm not so sure about this.

Part of me says "Hey, why not?" Let's fill the world with people with disabilities. Why should these people bed critized. If they want handicapped kids, more power too them. Maybe it will balance out all the people who put down handicapped kids.

But, part of me holds back. I think that the best hope we can have for our children is that they have a fine easy life. Because of the horribleness of the world, gay, disabled, black, adopted and so on children do not have an easy time. While I would not be bothered if Jeff had a physical limitation, I would be bothered by the masses of idiots who would give him a hard time (note: when I was 1 1/2 a STRANGER when up to my 19 year mother in the park and said "what's WRONG with your baby?") I also am not too thrilled about the exclusionary nature of the deaf community. As I have said many times in these pages - I hate excluding. I think it's small-minded.

I think we all need to start loving our children on THEIR terms for who they are.
Unless they want to join the Army -put um in one-way mail to Canada.

No comments: